De Javu

HAHA

Eye-opening banget kejadian hari ini. Nyelekit tapi bikin mikir sih. Gile bisa terulang gitu ya oleh orang yang sama di waktu yang berbeda, tapi kejadiannya sama persis gitu. Bisa-bisanya kena bohong 2x kayak wow bego juga gue dikadalin 2x cuma beda waktu dan beda subyek aja wkwk

Lebih ke speechless tapi terus yaudah, the puzzle fits in and everything jadi make sense. The way Aa insist to make the relationship over while... he was also the one who insist for us to balikan at the beginning, fully known the consequences and endings. And the way another person who knows (have met with) me, knows my value in Aa life and knows the whole story of the relationship, getting way too excited about his new journey.

Well... heran tapi kaget tapi yaudah. Turns out we become enemy ya after all. I genuinely grateful and happy for your coming-soon-marriage. But it is also acceptable if I got disappointed kan? Not because you finally found the one but because I got fooled twice wkwk bgst juga.

Let's break it down, shall we?

First heartbreak, the reason of break-up is because you said mau memantaskan diri, mau memperbaiki diri, eh rupanya ada orang lain. Then it's fall apart, you get back to me and I accept you for second chance (yes, so dumb). Second heartbreak, the reason of break-up is because you said you have target to get married on your 30s and will need some time to move on, to be alone, to be healed, to be neutral and start fresh. Healing healing tai kucing. Karena there is orang lain juga ternyata. De Javu. It's happening again~

Not sure apakah takdir memang selucu itu atau tabiat aja ya. But one thing for sure is your behavior remains the same while my shield is getting stronger. Untungnya gue nggak segalau dan sehancur dulu karena pertahanan gue lebih kuat sekarang. Rasa sakit hati masih ada tapi yaudah, it will heal over the night, and the tears help to wash away the pain too. Juga rasa sakit hatinya memang kalah sama rasa kecewa, benci dan kesel sama diri sendiri kok bego banget dah gue jadi orang.

Been told the story to my closest friend, they are making the same response and agree at one point: I only being used for his pegangan. He only let me go once he hold onto his back-up hands, and then after that, the table turns and I become his new back-up. Nggak lagi sih, got fooled twice is dumb, got fooled more than twice is animal dude kaya lu bisa mikir nggak sih? Punya akal sehat nggak? Manusia dibikin dengan akal sehat, pake dong? Alias t o l o l d a h l u~

That's it. Enough is enough. Hope you can focus on your new life and get the f out from my blog.

Adios good bye~ I will pray so you will have a good marriage. Literally. From deep down of my heart. So we will not have to cross-path again in this life.